Photo sharing experiment​

I am not active on social media. I do browse around and consume content but I have never been active in posting on social media. It is not an active choice but as a private person, I tend not to post or interact with what others are posting. As an experiment, I did the following:

• Started posting every day about my swim. I did it via stories on Facebook, Instagram, Whatsapp
• Started posting every 2 weeks about significant life events. Eg anniversary of my parents

Observations about self​

After performing the activity for around 15 days, I observed the following:

• I felt a dopamine loop started kicking in after the 7th days - updating others about what I am doing -> them asking about it -> me wanting to update them more about it.
• I felt curious about the statistics - reach, speed of reach and interactions of others with my posts. I felt it has a positive feedback loop too.

Observations about others​

I observed the following about my social network friends:

• Many of them interacted my stories on the same time of the day. My guess it that social media is a routine for them, for example, first thing in the day or scrolling in bed at night
• Many of my friends discussed about the photo shared in face to face meetings. It was quite unexpected as it is opposite to what the social media product intends to do.

Dopamine Rush​

Dopamine is a really powerful ingredient in the success of social media. I do not find being active on Instagram / Whatsapp to be of much use for me personally. A powerful fact which I looped back to, from the book Stolen Focus: Why You Can't Pay Attention

Screen time: For the average American, it’s three hours and fifteen minutes. We touch our phones 2,617 times every twenty-four hours.

He adds further about the nature of use of social media. If you are consuming hours of content on social media - thinking that you are being in touch - you are wrong, you are distracting yourself with what others are updating you about!

It’s when you set aside your distractions, he said, that you begin to see what you were distracting yourself from.

Hard to reverse progress​

A sign of highly intelligent people is that they ask the question - Why? - very frequently. The topic could be money, progress, learning, lifestyle, relationship or self. Changing yourself and making new habits stacks high up in the first decile i.e. 0 to 10 percentile. Also, they consistently ask the question - Why? - instead of - Why not?

Answering the question - Why?​

You will have to think deep and long to answer the why type questions. A few questions of this kind would be:

• Why should I hire this person?
• Why should I attend this meetup or party?
• Why should I read everyday?

Answering the why question is personal and individualistic. While answering it, you remind yourself about your preferences, goals and principles. If you are honestly answering your why and following up with answers. You will be more satisfied in the activity.

Answering the question - Why not?​

Either we or people around us ask the why not type question. A few questions of this kind would be:

• Why not grow the business faster?
• Why not have a long night?
• Why not to watch the next episode on Netflix?

Answering the why not question is backward thinking. While answering it, you argue in head altruistically. Answering a why not honestly can lead to dilemma, disagreement and discontentment.

Finding the why around your daily time spent is a great way to know yourself better Since 2021, I have started enjoying and taking more decisions around the why type questions over the why not type questions.

Sofa Shopping​

Retail shopping can be open ended and never ending. Especially, if the product is high involvement, customized for space and has a long gratification cycle. I visited two stores in Jaipur - Wooden Street and Godrej Interio for sofa at home.

Setting aside the specifics of design, value proposition of the two brands, I had two interesting observations.

Wooden Street - New vs Repeat Purchase​

The sales representative at Wooden Street, C Scheme, Jaipur asked me for my mobile number and pulled up the previous purchases, queries for my account. He then customized his pitch depending on my previous purchases. Like a new business would, he customized the sales process for me.

Godrej Interio - Old Guard​

Also visited the Godrej Interio store in Jaipur. This Godrej store is a company owned store and others in Jaipur might be franchise stores. Since the old & outgoing sofa is also Godrej, I asked the sales representative to help me find a buyer for it. In fairness, he told me that he can try but cannot promise.

Both the stores bring a unique value proposition for the customers but operate so differently. The newness of Wooden Street in product, pitch, sales, customer satisfaction stacks up quite well against the trust and brand of Godrej.

Happy Holi 2023​

I feel happy to have celebrated Holi at home with mom and dad. Also it was nice to meet old neighbors and recall life 15 years ago.

Holi festival in Jaipur is an explosion of colors, joy, and laughter. The streets are filled with people of all ages, drenched in hues of pink, blue, green, and yellow. The air is thick with the aroma of mouth-watering delicacies like gujiyas, thandai, and sweets. Music and dance fill the atmosphere as people sway to the beats of dhol and sing folk songs. The highlight of the festival is the throwing of colored powder and water, as people smear each other's faces and clothes with glee. It's a day when everyone is equal, and all social barriers are broken down. So if you're in Jaipur during Holi, be ready to get messy, let go of inhibitions, and have the time of your life!

What is nuisance value​

Relationships, either personal or business, create situations where people find themselves in the position of nuisance. Typically, in such a case, they are unable to create value for the organization, for themselves or for those near them. But they are capable of causing inconvenience or annoyance. Most rational individuals avoid conflicts, look at the bigger picture but under such circumstances, they are tempted to milk the nuisance.

Nuisance value in business​

In businesses, both velocity and acceleration in decision are important for generating meaningful outcomes. In India, a lot of compliances are needed by the Govt of India including signing of documents by Directors. Ofcourse, they are rightfully placed to ensure the checks and balances in Private Organizations.

Many a times, businesses are stalled, demotivated, threatened by the Directors for appeasing their own ego. Negative outcomes are part and parcel of business, nuisance is both negative and demotivating for most businesses.

Trip to Jaipur​

For Holi 2023, I traveled via road from Gurgaon to Jaipur on Sunday 5th March 2023

• The new route is via Sohna - Dausa - Lalsot
• Gurgaon to Sohna is an easy drive and living in Sohna and working on Golf Course Extension is a realistic possibility with less than 30 minutes travel time.

New roads vd old roads in India​

The roads made in the last few years are significantly better to drive on. They are wider, better marked, better built and more like expressways instead of highways. On the new expressways, attaining an average speed of 100 km per hour is now possible and comfortable.

Gurgaon to Jaipur route​

The new Gurgaon to Jaipur route is definitely much better than the old one. Only the highway continues from Dausa to Jaipur is congested and poor to drive upon and hopefully will be replace via an Expressway.

Drive safe and stay alert!

There's no such thing as a free lunch​

One of the major learnings from There's no such thing as a free lunch for me has been that everything costs in either time, resources, opportunity. The person/entity that ends up paying for it may or may not be the inefficient person/entity.

Inefficient people cost double​

In my experience, working with people who know what they are doing is 5x better than people who are not. The reasons are:

1. Inefficient people suck time and energy
2. After a few tries, both the efficient and inefficient entities are frustrated from the interaction
3. Inefficient people make their work your work

Looking back​

I have enjoyed working with people who are organized, manage their work & calendar effectively. Typically anyone who maintains a workbook and has the patience to understand the problem/process on an atomic level becomes efficient. Typical examples of inefficiencies which have costed me are:

1. The member does not maintain compliance and you end up paying for it.
2. The member does not understand the process/task but claims to. It leads to misplaced faith in execution.

Career Switch​

Met Ameya yesterday evening and wished him all the best to start in his new role at TPA Global - a new Legaltech Firm.

Beginnings​

Beginnings are weirdly exciting and change in the only constant in life. I have learnt that only when I embrace change fully, I enjoy the new normal fully.

At Chayoos, Worldmark Aerocity

Swimming Routine​

I book my swimming sessions using Fitso. While I started learning swimming in March 2022 - at the age of 33. I have started enjoying it a lot, because:

• It is a new skill that I have picked up after college
• I have struggled to improve but persisted for a year now

50 minute swim slot​

I choose before entering the pool either of - 1km, 1.5km or 2km swim for the day. I have found that the act of choosing before helps me to push myself to reach the goal. A 50 minute swim is reasonably long and you can easily do 500+ active calories in the session.

Flow state while swimming​

Since the last 6 months, I have been able to attain a flow state while swimming relatively swimming. Some of the benefits which compound over an year:

• You cannot talk or listen to under water
• You cannot check your phone
• You start observing self talk
• You build a routine of talking to yourself

What I currently think about while swimming​

I have recently started swimming in the morning at 6 am:

• I remind myself about who I am, where I am. It helps me orient myself in the morning. It goes something like: I am Gaurav Parashar, son of Abhay & Jyoti Parashar, currently in Gurgaon ..
• I remind myself about the day, date & month. This forces me to zoom out time to a monthly scale.
• During one of the guide meditations via YT, I learnt how visualizing your loved ones increases the satisfaction of the day. I think about family, friends, people I have met.
• I keep going back to thinking about work, and every time that happens, I gently guide it out of my thoughts.

Swim, 2 Mar 2023

A unique experience was meditating at Langkawi Sky Bridge - I could feel that the curved cable-stayed bridge vibrates/oscillates ever so slightly.

Observing weather and mood​

Temperature, humidity, wind, air quality, sunshine/radiation play a very important role in how I sleep, feel and focus during the day. Observing the extremes in daily life is easier:

• Winters in Delhi NCR and Gurgaon lower the mood due to the smog and temperature
• Hot wind (loo) and extreme heat in summers of Rajasthan increase the stress in my body
• A super cold blast from air conditioners reduces my focus on work

Weather or Seasons by City​

Looking back, the weather of Bangalore throughout the year or Springtime in London has been the most satiating weather I have experienced. The reasons are:

1. Mood is upbeat throughout the day
2. Productivity per hour is high
3. Deep work is easier due to higher focus

Ideal City Hopping for me​

1. Spring in London
2. Summer in Bangalore
3. Fall in Gurgaon or Dubai
4. Winter in Jaipur

Bluewaters Bay, Dubai 2019

A unique experience was meditating at Langkawi Sky Bridge - I could feel that the curved cable-stayed bridge vibrates/oscillates ever so slightly.