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(DAY 547) Why I Refuse to Alter My Plans for Others

· 5 min read
Gaurav Parashar

The world is constantly changing, with new demands on our time and attention coming from all directions. Work deadlines, social obligations, family commitments - it can feel like we're being pulled in a million different ways. And amidst all of this, there is often an expectation that we should be flexible, accommodating the needs and schedules of those around us. However, as I've grown older, I've found it increasingly difficult to simply change my plans at the behest of others. My time and attention are precious resources, and safeguarding them is crucial not just for my professional success, but for my personal well-being as well.

You see, I'm the type of person who thrives on routine and structure. I'm a planner by nature, meticulously organizing my days, weeks, and months to ensure maximum productivity and efficiency. And when those carefully laid plans are disrupted, it has a profound effect on my mood, my mindset, and my overall sense of control. I know that some may view this as stubbornness or inflexibility. "You need to be more adaptable," they'll say. "Life is unpredictable, and you have to be willing to go with the flow." But the truth is, I've tried that approach, and it simply doesn't work for me. When I allow my schedule to be dictated by the whims and needs of others, I find myself feeling overwhelmed, anxious, and resentful. It's not that I'm incapable of being flexible - I can absolutely accommodate the occasional last-minute change or unexpected request. But when it becomes a regular occurrence, when I'm constantly rearranging my calendar to fit someone else's agenda, it starts to take a toll. My productivity suffers, my focus wanes, and I find myself feeling increasingly frustrated and burnt out.

And so, I've made the conscious decision to prioritize my own needs and goals, even if it means occasionally disappointing or inconveniencing others. I've learned to politely but firmly push back when someone tries to insert themselves into my carefully curated schedule, explaining that I simply can't make the change work for me. And you know what? More often than not, they understand and respect my position. Because the truth is, we all have a finite amount of time and energy, and it's up to us to decide how to allocate those precious resources. For me, that means reserving the bulk of my attention for the things and people that truly matter - my work, my personal projects, my loved ones. I simply can't afford to constantly be rearranging my life to accommodate the whims of others. Now, I know what you might be thinking - "But what about being a team player? What about being a good friend or family member?" And I hear you. I truly do. But I've come to realize that there's a difference between being a supportive, engaged member of a team or community, and being a doormat. And I refuse to be the latter. Because here's the thing - when I'm constantly bending over backwards to accommodate the needs of others, it doesn't just impact me. It also affects those around me, as I become more stressed, more irritable, and less present. And ultimately, that doesn't serve anyone.

So instead, I've learned to set clear boundaries and manage expectations. I'm upfront about my schedule and my commitments, and I'm not afraid to say no when something doesn't fit. And you know what? The world hasn't ended. My relationships haven't crumbled. In fact, in many cases, the people in my life have actually come to respect and appreciate my unwavering focus and dedication. Of course, there are still times when I do have to adjust my plans - when a loved one is in need, or when a work obligation takes precedence. But those instances are the exception, not the rule. And when I do make those changes, it's because I've made a conscious decision to do so, not because I've been bullied or pressured into it. Because at the end of the day, my time and my energy are the most valuable resources I have. And I refuse to squander them simply to placate the demands of others. I have my own dreams and goals, my own passions and priorities. And I'm not willing to compromise them, no matter how much someone else might wish me to. So if you're someone who also struggles with the pressure to constantly rearrange your life to fit the needs of others, I encourage you to take a step back and reflect on your own priorities. What truly matters to you? What are the non-negotiables in your life? And how can you set boundaries and manage expectations in a way that allows you to stay true to yourself?

It's not always easy, I'll admit. There will be times when you have to make tough choices, when you have to disappoint someone or say no to a request. But I can promise you, the payoff is worth it. Because when you're able to maintain your focus, to stay true to your own path, you'll find that you're not just more productive and successful - you're also happier, healthier, and more fulfilled. So stand your ground, my friends. Refuse to be a slave to the schedules and demands of others. Carve out the time and space you need to pursue your own dreams and goals. And know that in doing so, you're not just honoring yourself - you're also setting an example for those around you, showing them that it's possible to live a life of true purpose and intention.